If this bowl of;
- poo pushing
- nerve-calming
- veggie-full
- salted caramel
- blood sugar balancing
GOODNESS could talk, it would say;
“Calm the FARK down”
– Sincerely, your porridge bowl
Let’s briefly talk ingredients;
- Wheat-free oats – poo-evacuating roughage for the win
- Cauliflower – sneaky veg for liver-loving measure
- Tahini – calcium-rich creaminess
- Medjool dates – sweetness with dump-persuading fibre
- Cinnamon – to balance blood sugar
- Maca – stress-modulating caramel powder
- Banana – magnesium-rich and shaped like a glorious poo
- Salted Macadamia butter – bowel-lubricating fats and minerals
And now, for the recipe. I shan’t waste your time with loads of pictures, embedded adds and ramblings about why vitamins are amazing and pooing is essential. YOU KNOW THIS.
Calm The F A R K Down Porridge Bowl
- 1/3 cup wheat-free oats
- 1 heaped Tablespoons tahini
- 2 pitted Medjool dates
- 1 cup steamed cauliflower blended with 1 1/2 cups water
- 1 teaspoon maca powder
- 1 teaspoon cinnamon
- 1 ripe banana, to serve
- 1 massive (and I mean mega) spoon FULL of salted macadamia butter (for those that don’t take things literally, this is macadamia butter that has been spiked with pink or sea salt)
Place your cauliflower liquid in a saucepan with oats and dates. Bring to the boil and then reduce heat and simmer until thick, soft and creamy. Try breaking your dates up with the mixing spoon. Turn off the heat and add stir through maca, cinnamon and tahini.
Serve with your ripe banana which you were thoughtful enough to slice up and that generous (AND I MEAN GENEROUS) dollop of salted macadamia butter. If you like crunch like yours truly, add a handful of roasted cashews to the top! Yumbo Jumbo! Now, retreat outside to the sunshine with a glorious read – I know of one if you’re looking – and calm the F A R K down so that you can rest and digest!
